I, BEStowe, My Blog to You....

MIND BODY SOUL Experience

2009-10-16T17:06:00.002-06:00

Fall has arrived, the leaves are changing and for the first time since June I am able to sleep with a blanket in my non-air conditioned apartment! But I live downtown, so it's okay!

Tomorrow I will be Numerology Readings at the MIND BODY SOUL Experience at the Salt Lake Center for Spiritual Living! It is a fantastic event that will be held the third Saturday of every month from 11:00am - 2:00pm. I am so honored to have been invited to join these amazing people for such a wonderful event! There will be intuitive readers, energy healers, spiritual counseling and ME! The Modern Intuitive Numerologist! I like the sound of that. I am trying to brand myself and now refer to myself as the Modern Intuitive. I have yet to reserve a table at a resturant under that name, but I have thought about it!

I am getting off the subject at hand! The MIND BODY SOUL Experience! I am a little nervous....I only have 20 minutes to WOW someone with my Numerological skills, and I am afraid that I will forget how to add! I really don't want to completely screw up someones chart due to nerves! So I have been trying to calm myself, meditate, prepair for tomorrow by adding and reminding myself of the basics....1+4=5, I=9, 16=7 and that is a Karmic Debt....who am I kidding? I am sure I will be fine. I will check my nervous energy at the door, and if it is still sitting there when I leave, I will throw it in the middle of the road! Positive thoughts! Yes!

So, wish me luck! And I will let you know how fabulous all my charts turn out for the MIND BODY SOUL Experience!

And if you would like one for yourself, email me at betsy@modernintuitive.com or go to my website www.modernintuitive.com and click on the eStore button at the top right hand corner! I would love to make a beautiful chart for you and if you mention this post - I will give you $10 off! How about it?

From Ego to Acceptance....

2009-08-23T22:20:00.002-06:00

I have spent the past few days studying and soul searching. It is one of my favorite past times. I love to learn, grow and strive to be a better person...strive to be my true self. That self that is not compromised by the ego. It is a life long attempt that will never cease. We all battle our own egos, to what extent depends on the person. The ego can be very damaging. Not just to us, but to those who are close to us, and even those who we only connect with in passing. When we work from the ego side of ourselves, it is hard to look at or deal with a situtation from a neutral position. We become involved on a personal level, and often times it has nothing to do with us - but the ego makes you believe that it's all about you! It is impossible to explain to an ego that the world does not revolve around it...to an ego, that is all there is and nothing else matters. The fact remains, each of us as individuals are so tiny compaired to the vast world in which we live.

Where am I going with this? I am not really sure, to be honest. But it is something that has been on my mind. It bothers me how some people can be so stuck in their own ego that they cannot see the truth. However, on the same level, it is my ego that is bothered by it. I have no place in which to be bothered, its not me, it has nothing to do with me, its not my issue, it is theirs. However, I still find myself judging them. When we cast judgement on others, we are only casting judgement on ourselves. So when I find myself judging someone for placing their ego above all else, perhaps I feel guilty knowing that I sometimes do the same.

Acceptance. Some things we cannot change. How someone else deals with life and goes about their business is not any of our concern. When these people are close to us, it makes that acceptance even more difficult. Especially when we are effected with the rath of their ego....but it is THEIR ego, and not only do we need to find acceptance with them, but with ourselves as well. That in and of itself can be an arduous task. We often need to push our own ego aside, and know that they struggle just like we do, and that struggle goes beyond the ego and down to the soul. So I guess I just need to accept myself, accept them for what they are, love them or not, and go on my way. I will never try to change them or tell them different, it is not my place. My life is my place, and my ego is enough ego to tame - I am not willing to take on anyone elses!

The Modern Intuitive...

2009-08-19T20:42:00.002-06:00

Wow! It has been a long time since my last post, but I have made headway on my website. Not only have I made headway - but I have made my website!!! And it is published online! My last post was sometime in April, where I was ranting about how difficult putting my website together was. Well, its been 4 months, give or take, and I have finally accomplished it! Given, I have not spent the past 4 months playing with templates, configuring different font sizes and writing content...come on! Life gets in the way! It happens to all of us! My sister got married, so that was 2 or 3 trips back to the mitten for bridal showers, fittings and the wedding of the century that took 18 months to plan! I found a boyfriend. Yup! Just picked him up off the street, dusted him off an brought him home! Mom and Dad have not met him yet - but no worries! I am sure they will love him! And the Real Estate business has picked up! Despite what you see in the papers and watch on the doom and gloom news - people are still buying and selling property! Weird! I know!

It is interesting how life can take us on these bizarre paths, weaving us in and out of that direct line from point A to point B. I mean, when I finally got down to finding a host, purchasing a domain name and selecting a template, it was only a matter of hours before I was up and running. That is what I set out to do in April, and here we are the middle to end of August! However, I will say that the website I would have built (or tried to build) then would be nothing like the one I have put together in the past couple of days. I guess as much as I though I was ready to go forward with this thought in my head, the Universe - Life - was a step ahead of me and knew that it was not the right time. So they threw at me a few things to take my mind off of what I was trying to create. I am okay with that! My beautiful sister is married to a wonderful man I now call my brother-in-law! I have an awesome new partner in crime to spend time with! And I made almost enough money to pay my rent!

I guess what I am getting at is that no matter what we think we have in store for ourselves, we may not be seeing or understanding the entire picture. We may not realize that all the pieces are not present. Lucky for us, there is a much larger, more magnificent force at work for us, pushing and pulling us (or throwing things at us) to take us where we need to be....filling in the rest of the pieces, I guess.

It has taken me years to accept this, but it is the way I look at life : Everything happens for a reason. There is purpose to chaos and confusion. Everything is exactly the way it should be, and it takes faith to know that it won't always be like this....there is always something waiting for us around the bend.

So - here it is! Check out the link below...its my WEBSITE!!!!

www.modernintuitive.com

Room to Grow....

2009-04-07T16:51:00.007-06:00

So, it has been about two months since I have purchased a domain name in hopes of having a website up and running within a few days. Those hopes were pretty much shattered about six hours after clicking SUBMIT. I thought I knew exactly the kind of website I wanted to create. I wanted it to be etheral yet still professional. I wanted it to be mystical yet not cheesy. I want it to be representative of what I do and who I am, I guess that is the hard part. I have now realized that I only have an idea of how I want to represent that, yet I know exactly how I don't want to represent it! I don't want it to look like those neon signs that say "PSYCHIC READINGS" with part of a letter not lit up, hanging in the window of an old house on a dark, creepy street as the wind blows and thunder and lightning start to crackle in the sky. You know, like the image they show in a movie when the main character dares to test her fate in the hands of some gypsy looking woman sitting behind a crystal ball, with candles burning and cobwebs filling the corners. I want to portray the modern day psychic intuitive. I don't want to feed the false image of a con-artist thriving on the desperation of others while conjuring spirits in the back room. It is funny, as I write this post, it is taking a much different direction than I had anticipated. I wanted to release my frustrations about backgrounds, templates, fonts, tabs and what nots, but I don't think that is what is holding me back with the completion of this site. I now realize that I want to be the modern day psychic intuitive, yet I don't even know what that is or what it would look like if I tried to create that image in the form of a web page. As much as I thought I was ready to put myself out there on the web and stand strong next to who I am and what I do, I am not sure I know exactly what all that entails....but I have an idea! Like a seed beneith the soil, it will soon begin to take its natural form. That is what I want my website to be, a natural, organic extension of who I am....a diffinitive representation would be next to impossible. I don't want to define myself, I want to give myself room to grow.

Dusting off the Skeletons from the Closet....

2009-03-30T20:05:00.000-06:00

So it’s been a while since I have posted. Wow, how fast life moves. It is as if it happens without even knowing it. As if one day you wake up, and all of a sudden you realize that what once was is no longer. It can happen in an instant; a moment of clarity, if you will.

The Universe has had its way with me recently. Skeletons I have hid in the closet for months, even years, have recently found their way out and back into my life. I am not unhappy about this. It feels good to clean out this stale, stagnant energy I have been carrying around hoping one day it would finally leave me or resolve itself. If only it were that easy. Wouldn’t it be nice for our past to have a shelf life? If only after so long, it could just become nonexistent, or even neutral. It is already spoiled and no longer serves us; for that is why we stuff it in the closet to begin with. In an effort to get rid of it and remove it from our lives yet still keep it close by. We must deal with our skeletons, as scary and cobweb filled as they may be; we must deal with them.

Let’s bring these skeletons into the light; shake them out and dust them off. Ahhh…not as scary as we thought! No, for they are still a part of us; or at least a part of what we once were. They can bring back fond memories, hurt feelings and a sense that we have moved on. It is the final phase of completion. In order to eradicate them totally from our lives, we must find peace with our skeletons. We must find an understanding of not only when they were an integral part of our lives, but an understanding of why we stuffed them in the closet to begin with.

The seasons change and so do the trends. What once was is now no longer, but if we have not yet already learned, let us remind ourselves that history does repeat itself; what once was will come back again, in another form. Let it not be good, let it not be bad – just let it be, accept it and find peace with it. For under our skin and flesh, are we not skeletons ourselves?

2 More Hours...Thats It? Really?

2009-02-27T11:57:00.003-07:00

Today is day 3 of 3 (thank God!) doing the 9-5 gig behind the front desk at the Real Estate office. The office manager is out of town and I am filling in. I help out a few hours here and there, but no more than 4 hours in a row. This little 9-5 stint reminds me how much I HATE to be tied down! I almost lost it yesterday, and that occurred around 3:00 pm. So I spent two hours specifically reminding myself that banging my head against the desk will not make time go by any faster, it just gives me something else to do.

To help time pass by a little quicker, I decided to sit in on the "Technology Training" class we had this morning. A conference room full of Realtors with their lap tops, 3 of which knew just enough about computers to make themselves dangerous, and the rest of the room was still wondering what in the hell a blog was. I think I could have convinced half the people in the class that a widget is a small furry animal, and I would have liked to, except for the first hour and a half of my morning was busier than my entire day yesterday. I had 42 phone calls, 7 emails, and 2 people set the building alarm off between 8:03 and 8:36AM, which resulted in some security guard coming to my office to make sure everything was okay. Thanks, buddie! I think if there were an actual threat, and an actual intruder in the office, I would be killed by now! It is now 9:17, over an hour since the first alarm went off! Someone could have made off with half the office, including the hideous plant that is currently sitting in front of me. And this is the start of my work day....so glad it is Friday!

So I am thinking busy morning = lazy afternoon. Somebody please slap me upside my head for having such false hopes! Since real estate agents only get paid when they sell a house, they expect to get paid the minute before funds are transferred. So, for some reason, my Broker decided it would be a good idea for me to cut the checks....WTF??? Okay, that is what the office manager does, it goes way above and beyond the "Thank You for calling Windermere, this is Elizabeth...please hold" call of duty I am assigned to for no more than 4 hours at a time! Not to mention my black thumb when it comes to operating electrical devices, yup, that includes computers and printers! So naturally, the first check I attempt to print out, gets the wrath of the printer malfunction, which I am just about positive had something to do with me clicking PRINT. Apparently, this is a big problem. Not just a big problem, but a HUGE problem. I am not sure how or when this will be dealt with, but I hope I don't have to be a part of it, and I really hope a gang of under paid Realtors are not waiting in the dark ally behind my building when I get home. However, at this point, it is almost 3:00 and the thought of being knocked out at the first blow sounds less painful than banging my head against the desk repeatedly for the next two hours.

Understanding Destiny

2009-02-26T20:48:00.003-07:00

I believe there are certain things each and every one of us are meant for. Things we are meant to do, learn, share, and experience. This is our destiny. I don't believe there is anything that happens without consequence, for everything has it's purpose. Even the most tragic and unpleasant experiences we live through have their place in life. If we never felt tragedy, would we know when we are blessed? If we never experienced an unpleasant situation, would we recognize a pleasant one? How would we ever decipher good from bad or right from wrong?

We all have moments in our lives we wouldn't wish upon our worst enemy. Moments we wish we never had to experience. Moments where we question and wonder if we have what it takes to continue. Moments where we seem to be at war with ourselves and begin to wonder if there even is a God. Yet these moments are a part of life and a part of our destiny. It is part of a process our soul goes through in an effort to rid what is no longer serving us in order to make room for what is to come.

As I look back on the past couple of years of my young life, I see I went through many unpleasant experiences. I use the term "went through" because they are no longer experiences I am dealing with or working on currently. I have learned from them, and they were not easy. Many of them brought me great pain, heartache, confusion, a sense of loss and even a sense of being lost. However, I have realized that the situations in life that have made me most uncomfortable and caused me much strain, were the situations that brought profound change and a sense of enlightenment. Each of these situations, all of these changes are different, yet not separate. It was a Universal effort to bring me to where I am today. If any one single situation had not occurred, who knows what direction it would have led me and who knows where and what I would be today. Looking back I am certainly not ready to embrace the pain and confusion, and I am not sure if I ever will, but I have a deep respect for what life has put me through, and a sense of pride for over coming these challenges. They have brought me strength, courage and a better understanding of my own destiny.

Time to Socialize.....

2009-02-23T20:38:00.004-07:00

This evening I attended a Healers Networking event. Networking things kinda freak me out. Its like being social on purpose, and I am not always a social person. If you have seen me in a social setting, you may very well think I love to socialize and would possibly consider me a fantastic socialite. This would most likely be a social setting where wine and or booze is involved. This was not that type of event. It was held at the Tea Grotto in Salt Lake City with spiritually minded people, not a "knock 'em back" kind of place or crowd. It is a lovely setting with brilliant energy and kind souls. Still, upon first arrival, I fell into this "what am I supposed to be doing?" mode, and felt a bit nervous. What if nobody wanted to talk to me? What if I had nothing interesting to say? What if I quit thinking so much and just act naturally? Hmm...what a concept! It wasn't long before I found myself in conversation with a few familiar faces and a few new ones. What a blessing! The gentleman sitting next to me, sipping the sweetest smelling tea was incredibly interesting. He shared the story of his spiritual journey and I shared mine with him. Like myself, he started at a young age and followed his heart, even when his head asked "What? Are you serious? Ummm...okay." I guess we all do that at times. Question, then slightly freak out, but continue on because we know that we have to do it, even if we don't know what it is or why. Our souls know, on a deeper level, and our hearts and minds follow. That is how I like to live my life, intuitively, but without all the answers. Where would all the fun be in life if we already knew what pleasant surprises were awaiting us around the corner? What would there be to look forward to? I seek knowledge and I seek understanding, but never will the day come that I seek to be all knowing. That would take the fun out of living, and I want to continue to enjoy myself, even at social networking events.

Oh My Blog!!!

2009-02-22T18:17:00.003-07:00

I have been wanting to create a blog for some time now. I have been researching about blogs, how to create a blog, how to blog, what to blog, who to blog.....blog, blog, blog! I had a bit of a grasp on it all, but still no blog....until now! I actually created it without even knowing it....so to speak. I got onto blogger.com and decided to create an account, thinking that I would just be able to browse about other people's blogs, and create my own on my own sweet time, that's how I do things, on my own sweet time. All of a sudden, I had to name it! MY BLOG!!! I had to name it and check for availability! (What the!...ummm...uh.....BESTOWE!) Yup! Its available. Ugh! I had a mini panic attack - OMG! I have a blog! I don't know if I am ready....uh...JUST STOP! Quit thinking so much! I totally over analyze and over think things all the time. I could think about something all day and never do it - that is what I have been doing with my blog, as if it is going to manifest itself without my fingers diligently typing into my keyboard. Now I have done it! I have created my blog, on my own sweet time, between loads of laundry. Ahhh....a sweet sense of accomplishment. Not only do I now have a blog, but clean towels for tomorrow as well.